Funny how life works. I wonder sometimes how I survive this world for 16 to be 17 years of being alive. I'm different. I always knew that. I tried to be in the crowd, y know being normal so that you won't look like a total freakin freak. haha. No matter how I do it, people can recognize me easily as a freak. I tried and I know I can't be someone else forever. I tried to blend in but something inside me keeps on telling me "this is not you", "this is not you","this is not you". What can I do? Everyone is okay so I tell myself, "Something is wrong with you. You should change". Change to what? Normal? Will that make you ever happy? Live off as someone else? Is that what you really want?
Honestly, I don't know. Indirectly, I have learnt that how the society pressure could turn someone to be someone that they don't want. Nothing's is wrong being society wagon and nothing's wrong being different. Y know, like mitosis and meiosis. Nothing's wrong with those process. Those have benefits although the processes have some variation. That's just life. I described life as colourful.
I'm flawed. I'm sinned. I'm human. I'm imperfect. I accept my difference although it's tough sometimes especially when you have to be in the crowd. Don't say I didn't try hard enough. I did. I went to unfamiliar territory. Knowing that I would survive eventually. I did. I came out safe and sound.
You are not alone
Thursday, 19 March 2015
Friday, 6 March 2015
Dear to-be suicidal
ARE YOU INSANE OR STUPID OR JUST SIMPLY BRAINLESS?
First, i'm sorry for using those harsh words. I mean to. Don't you know how precious you are? The other side of the world is fighting for life but you? You are fighting for death? Seriously? Have you ever wonder what does it feels like being dead? No. Why? Because you've never been to that place before. People describe it as a deep, long, unending sleep. But what if it's not true? What if it's actually 100 times worse than life that you live in now? Everyone has a problem. I have a problem. You have a problem. Life is not a smooth sailing. You'll encounter sharks, pearl, pirates, dolphins along the journey. That's just life, buddy. If you were a victim of bullying, why do you bend down? You are a winner. No matter how a massive loser you are, you are still a winner. Why? You defeated your other rivals to fertilise your mom's ovum. Did you know how many rivals are there? Millions. Yes, it may sounds stupid but there is true behind it right? My advice to you and for myself as well, do not bend down. You are the strongest. Why are you letting those morons win by succeeding to make you taking your life? Life is once. Make use of it to the fullest to do good things. Be nice to the society although your society treat you like sh*t. Nothing's perfect buddy. Remember, when you are struggling to keep going, there are other sides of the world who's struggling like you or maybe even worse. I'm not perfect. I struggled a lot. Sometimes at one point, I just want everything to be silent but then I realize, it's not going to happen. Time is irreversible.It will continue to tick even though you are at the edge of the cliff. Don't let the time wins you. Don't waste your time curling in your problems. Get out of them. Be like a butterfly who just come out of their pupa. Spread your wings, live well. Do believe in God. He's up there giving you sparkles of 'black hole' to make you stronger and tougher and to be a better person. I know and always know, nothing can change you except yourself. If people ask you to change and you don't want to, what can they do? Be a good person buddy. Rule of my thumb: Be good to the society, be different as long as it's a positive thing, be happy, put faith in God.
Why I trust God so much? Because He gives me hope and direction. Life without God is like an empty can without direction. It's kind of cliche but for me to tell you, for you to find out. When you find God, your soul will be at ease. If you didn't find out, continue searching. There is One True Creator. You'll figure out. Keep on searching. You'll find the way home and belonging.
May God bless you
Colour of life
It's true some people give up even when they don't want to. The reason is simple, there is no hope left. As a human, learn to be grateful of what you have. Believe in God, that's the simplest thing you can ever done. When you have God, you'll learn to hope and give in. http://9gag.tv/p/aVvYy0/god-sent-me-for-you-giving-rs-1000-notes-to-needy-share-for-cause-can-money-buy?ref=jfs
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