Enigma

Funny how life works. I wonder sometimes how I survive this world for 16 to be 17 years of being alive. I'm different. I always knew that. I tried to be in the crowd, y know being normal so that you won't look like a total freakin freak. haha. No matter how I do it, people can recognize me easily as a freak. I tried and I know I can't be someone else forever. I tried to blend in but something inside me keeps on telling me "this is not you", "this is not you","this is not you". What can I do? Everyone is okay so I tell myself, "Something is wrong with you. You should change". Change to what? Normal? Will that make you ever happy? Live off as someone else? Is that what you really want?

Honestly, I don't know. Indirectly, I have learnt that how the society pressure could turn someone to be someone that they don't want. Nothing's is wrong being society wagon and nothing's wrong being different. Y know, like mitosis and meiosis. Nothing's wrong with those process. Those have benefits although the processes have some variation. That's just life. I described life as colourful.

I'm flawed. I'm sinned. I'm human. I'm imperfect. I accept my difference although it's tough sometimes especially when you have to be in the crowd. Don't say I didn't try hard enough. I did. I went to unfamiliar territory. Knowing that I would survive eventually. I did. I came out safe and sound.

You are not alone