"Maya, we're moving out end of this month." Said Camelia, Maya's mother one day after dinner. Her dad is not there. It's not a weird situation since Maya's dad often went abroad.
Maya just nodded without looking at her mother. She finishes her dinner as usual and leave her mother alone at the dinning room. She sits on the pink bean bag sofa at the corner of her room. She feels a bit relax and calm today because she has done Mrs Bee assignments. Maya reaches for her hand phone on the study table and starts log in twitter as usual. Twitter is where she communicates with her internet friend especially after she joins this one fandom. She feels happy because they are many people on the internet who cares about her. She thought her life was already complete.
Maya's father,William pick her up today at school. Her mother's turn to not be around at home today. It's either mother of father who'll be at home at one time. They're rarely been seen together as both are a busy working parents.
William takes Maya to TGIF for lunch. They sit at table number 34 and order some food not long after. Maya orders Grilled Chicken with black paper sauce and Strawberry Shake while her father orders Macaroni Cheese and Hot Coffee. While waiting for the food, Maya takes out her hand phone and do her usual activity that is tweeting. She ignores her father since she doesn't know what to say to her dad.
"Maya, we need to talk." William starts the conversation. Maya just nodded without looking at her dad.
"Excuse me young lady. I need your full attention." William snaps. Maya stares at her father for a while before keep her phone away.
"We'll move out this week." Said William next. His Hot Coffee has arrived and he starts to sip his coffee slowly.
"Why so fast dad? Mom said we'll move out end of this month. I don't want to leave my friend without leaving some notes." Maya tries to defend her situation. She doesn't understand why there are two different opinion especially when it comes her parents.
"We are moving to two different places, Maya. Dad will move to Sweden while mom will move to Russia. I thought you knew."
"No." Maya said motionlessly. In her mind, she doesn't care. She just want to stay here and full stop.
"We are separating, Maya." Wiliam said. At the same time, the food has arrived. The waiter serves the food in front of Maya and William nodded before he leave.
Maya stares at his father face for a while before pick up her fork and knife and start to cut the Grilled Chicken.
"Okay." Maya said with a flat tone. To her, it doesn't matter whether her parents divorcing or not because her life'll be the same and if her parents ever force her to stay with either of them, she'll just say she wants to stay here.
"You don't feel anything? Angry or sad?" William asked with concern. Her very own daughter acts like nothing has happen when his marriage are at the end of cliff.
"Yes. It doesn't matter whether you are breaking up or not because I don't feel this family unity at all. You and mom are busy with own life and so do I. You guys teach me to be independent and never cling on someone else in order to find your own happiness and this is what I'm doing right now. To me, dad and mom are just like a two visible figures who appear and disappear in my life alternately."
"How could you Maya! Are we really that useless parents to you? We give you the best education, the best school, the best brand of clothes, the best brand of shoes and we even support all your expenses on a trip to New Zealand! You are so ungrateful!" Dad starts to increase his tone. Maya knows her father is furious at her now but she doesn't care because she wants her dad to know how does she feels like all this while.
"So you knew about my trip to New Zealand? I thought you never care since you put a lot of money in my account every month until I don't have to ask for extra cash from you." Maya replied. She pushes her plate away. She lost her appetite.
"Maya! I am very disappointed with you! If I were you..." suddenly Wiliam's phone rings. He excuses himself and answer the phone call. Two minutes later he comes back.
"We'll talk about this later as a FAMILY at home. Right now, I have something that I am up to so excuse me. I have called a taxi for you and he'll send you back. Just to let you know honey, although mom and I are separating, you are the best thing we have ever had." Wiliam says before he leaves.
Tears coming down through her white pale cheek. What ever it is, she's not ready to go back home. She is mentally break down. Tears keep running down and her heart pains like a thousand of knives are stabbing her heart with no mercy.
She runs out from the restaurant and keep running across the street. She has no else to go but her legs couldn't stop running and so she let her legs direct her direction.
At last, she stops in front of the toy shop. She saw a mother is holding her toddler while his father is showing some cool toys. They are laughing each other every time their toddler laughs.
"I want to be like that toddler. How lucky he is." Said Maya. The heavy dark cloud could not support its weight anymore and the only solution is to expel its contain. Maya is cold and soaked but she doesn't care. She likes the feeling of being wet and cold. She stands in front of the toy shop until the couple and the toddler are gone but she is still there. Her mind is not there, it has flown to an unknown place. Empty but pain.
Around 6pm she comes back. Wiliam and Camelia are at living room doing their own work. Camelia is typing while Wiliam is texting. After they see Maya in that condition, they stop from doing their work. Camelia reaches for Maya but Maya pushes her away.
"I know we have something to talk about and it's really important. If not, why you are seen together with dad right? Let me change my clothes and we settle this thing out really quickly." Maya looks at her parents for a while before going upstairs.
Maya locks her door and cry again but this time is louder and much painful. To be honest, she doesn't want to discuss anything or hear anything. What she sees prove everything and there is no need for explanation. Explanation is just an excuse to make thing that is wrong to be seen correct. Her family is separating and what is it for to explain? To reduce the pain or to moderate the wrongness?
She feels like she can't continue this life anymore. Her adversity or challenges are beyond and she's not a tough girl who can endure everything.
She breaks the mirror and starts to cut her wrist. At first she feels relieved but then it starts to sting which is really hurt. Blood's coming out from the cut place and she fainted.
She remembers mom and dad used to cuddle her when she was small but everything's change when both of her parents start to have a clash about work. Dad is a successful businessman while mom is a successful meteorologist in Russia. At first, everything was okay. Dad doesn't mind about mom being away since she will call everyday and visit us every week. As the time flies, mom doesn't call very often and doesn't visit us every week anymore. Maybe she's busy with her work. Dad started to question mom about her responsibility towards Maya one day on the phone. She saw dad's face was red with anger. Am I a burden? She wondered.
Maya was under water but she felt relieved. She didn't feel anything. The pain, grief, anger, everything was gone like a melting ice in the water. As she swims deeper and deeper under the water, she feels much peace. She saw her mom's and dad's face as she look up. Both of them are fading from her sight. She tried to reach for them but they were way too far and she was way too deep. The pressure is pulling her down and she tried to go up as her parents offered their hands. The pain, grief and anger stroke her back like dagger in her heart as she tried to reach for her parents. She can't endure it anymore and at last she let herself determine where to go which is deeper and deeper under the water.
She woke up from her coma.She is at St Andrew Hospital. Mom and dad are not there. Maybe they are outside, Maya thought. Her injured hand was wrapped with a white bandage. Her body was way too weak for her to neither move nor walk but that doesn't stop her from going out of room. She is suffocating, she needs a fresh air. She walk slowly out of the room. There is no sign of her parents. She continues to walk and walk until she finds path that connects the internal building and external building. At last, she finds herself at the garden site of the hospital specialized for the recovery patient. She sat on the nearest bench. She was hungry and lethargic but she didn't want to go back to her hospital room. She sat there for a long time that she didn't realize 30 minutes has passed.
Suddenly someone squeeze her shoulder gently. It was her mom. She stares at her mother with blank expression. Her mom hugged her while tears streaming down her mom's pale face.
"Don't do it again baby. I love you." Mom kissed her forehead long before let her go. Mom's hand was still on her hand. She's not her usual mom. She's wearing white t-shirt with the word "MOM" written on the middle of the t-shirt and long black slack. No make up or accessories which mom usually put on before she goes out. Her eyes swallow and her lips dry and pale. She looks really tired and listless. "Is it because of me?" Maya wondered herself.
"Let's go in. It's getting cold out here." Mom said as she realized Maya was wearing hospital attire for patient and it was late afternoon of the middle of the spring. She waited for Maya to make a move but Maya didn't. Maya wanted to hurt her mother so badly the same way as mom hurt her by abandoning her and go to Russia. Well, it's not literally abandoning her but Mom leaves her and dad because of work. Maya ignored her mother. "Leave me alone and just go back to Russia and continue what you are supposed to do. You'd never care about me before and why you want to care about me so badly now?" Said Maya. Mom cleared her throat before she reply. " Baby, I'd never wanted to leave you. I miss you every second of my life"
"That's all? What kind of crap are you talking about? You miss me? Did I hear wrongly? If you really miss me why you didn't say anything each time we met before this? We had dinner together and live in the same rood but we never had an actual conversation. I feel like a statue in the house. Did you ever realize that?" Maya's voice started to raise her voice despite her weak condition.
"I'm sorry baby. I know I was wrong before. I want to fix it. Give me one more chance and I'll try to fix it the best as I could. I'll make up with dad. I promise." pleads with a grief tone as she cries at the same time. Maya has never see her mom cry this bad before. Maya knows her mom is a strong woman but now Maya doesn't know.
"No Camelia. I had enough! This is not the first time we try to make up. You'll do it again and again. You regret today and you'll do it again next time. I'm sorry I can't do this anymore." Dad appears out of no where. Maybe he was there a long time ago but mom and Maya didn't realize.
"William. She's sick. Please just this time." Mom pleads dad.
"I'm sorry. I can't. We'll sign the divorce agreement this week. I know I may sounded selfish and not considerate but Maya should know this. Till when she must be lied? She has gone through a lot. She must know that our relationship have reach to an end. Now or later she'll know soon. Don't be a hypocrite Camelia. Stop hurting her. You give her fake hope and leave her again." Dad said. There is no sad expression on dad's face. I don't know for how long this matter has been kept from me but the way dad acts, it seems that the problem has exist a long time ago.
"The real reason why you move to Russia is because of a guy." Dad continues.
"Stop it, William! She's sick." Mom gives dad a sharp look but dad doesn't care. He wants to continue some more and before dad continues, mom had slap him.
"I said enough!" Her voice cracks a bit.
"You stay with him at Russia and at the same time ask me to pretend everything is okay in front of Maya with reason for Maya's future. You used me because you know that Russian guy doesn't want Maya but you know if we divorced, Maya'll follow me. So you create excuses and I foolishly do as what you had said. You want everything in this life follow the flow that you have determined. You are selfish!" Dad revealed the truth as if the slap didn't lie on his face.
Mom didn't say anything after that because everything that dad has said is all true. She looked down embarrassed.
Maya let out a loud and long sigh. She was angry but at the same time relieved. She just knew about the truth of her parents. Maybe her parents are better off their own way. What's the point pretending everything is okay when the truth you are bleeding inside? Maya realized how her action just made things worse. She just about to continue the tortures again between her parents because of her doing.
Maya stands up and said "Mom, dad. Do what you are suppose to do. I don't want to become a cause of unhappiness. Two is better than one. That one person should give in for the sake of the two persons that she love and that is what I am doing right now. I'll be alright mom, dad."
They hugged each other as one family before went back inside and everything will change. A change that will make two person get back their happiness and one person in grief.
~The end~
"Maya! I am very disappointed with you! If I were you..." suddenly Wiliam's phone rings. He excuses himself and answer the phone call. Two minutes later he comes back.
"We'll talk about this later as a FAMILY at home. Right now, I have something that I am up to so excuse me. I have called a taxi for you and he'll send you back. Just to let you know honey, although mom and I are separating, you are the best thing we have ever had." Wiliam says before he leaves.
Tears coming down through her white pale cheek. What ever it is, she's not ready to go back home. She is mentally break down. Tears keep running down and her heart pains like a thousand of knives are stabbing her heart with no mercy.
She runs out from the restaurant and keep running across the street. She has no else to go but her legs couldn't stop running and so she let her legs direct her direction.
At last, she stops in front of the toy shop. She saw a mother is holding her toddler while his father is showing some cool toys. They are laughing each other every time their toddler laughs.
"I want to be like that toddler. How lucky he is." Said Maya. The heavy dark cloud could not support its weight anymore and the only solution is to expel its contain. Maya is cold and soaked but she doesn't care. She likes the feeling of being wet and cold. She stands in front of the toy shop until the couple and the toddler are gone but she is still there. Her mind is not there, it has flown to an unknown place. Empty but pain.
Around 6pm she comes back. Wiliam and Camelia are at living room doing their own work. Camelia is typing while Wiliam is texting. After they see Maya in that condition, they stop from doing their work. Camelia reaches for Maya but Maya pushes her away.
"I know we have something to talk about and it's really important. If not, why you are seen together with dad right? Let me change my clothes and we settle this thing out really quickly." Maya looks at her parents for a while before going upstairs.
Maya locks her door and cry again but this time is louder and much painful. To be honest, she doesn't want to discuss anything or hear anything. What she sees prove everything and there is no need for explanation. Explanation is just an excuse to make thing that is wrong to be seen correct. Her family is separating and what is it for to explain? To reduce the pain or to moderate the wrongness?
She feels like she can't continue this life anymore. Her adversity or challenges are beyond and she's not a tough girl who can endure everything.
She breaks the mirror and starts to cut her wrist. At first she feels relieved but then it starts to sting which is really hurt. Blood's coming out from the cut place and she fainted.
She remembers mom and dad used to cuddle her when she was small but everything's change when both of her parents start to have a clash about work. Dad is a successful businessman while mom is a successful meteorologist in Russia. At first, everything was okay. Dad doesn't mind about mom being away since she will call everyday and visit us every week. As the time flies, mom doesn't call very often and doesn't visit us every week anymore. Maybe she's busy with her work. Dad started to question mom about her responsibility towards Maya one day on the phone. She saw dad's face was red with anger. Am I a burden? She wondered.
Maya was under water but she felt relieved. She didn't feel anything. The pain, grief, anger, everything was gone like a melting ice in the water. As she swims deeper and deeper under the water, she feels much peace. She saw her mom's and dad's face as she look up. Both of them are fading from her sight. She tried to reach for them but they were way too far and she was way too deep. The pressure is pulling her down and she tried to go up as her parents offered their hands. The pain, grief and anger stroke her back like dagger in her heart as she tried to reach for her parents. She can't endure it anymore and at last she let herself determine where to go which is deeper and deeper under the water.
She woke up from her coma.She is at St Andrew Hospital. Mom and dad are not there. Maybe they are outside, Maya thought. Her injured hand was wrapped with a white bandage. Her body was way too weak for her to neither move nor walk but that doesn't stop her from going out of room. She is suffocating, she needs a fresh air. She walk slowly out of the room. There is no sign of her parents. She continues to walk and walk until she finds path that connects the internal building and external building. At last, she finds herself at the garden site of the hospital specialized for the recovery patient. She sat on the nearest bench. She was hungry and lethargic but she didn't want to go back to her hospital room. She sat there for a long time that she didn't realize 30 minutes has passed.
Suddenly someone squeeze her shoulder gently. It was her mom. She stares at her mother with blank expression. Her mom hugged her while tears streaming down her mom's pale face.
"Don't do it again baby. I love you." Mom kissed her forehead long before let her go. Mom's hand was still on her hand. She's not her usual mom. She's wearing white t-shirt with the word "MOM" written on the middle of the t-shirt and long black slack. No make up or accessories which mom usually put on before she goes out. Her eyes swallow and her lips dry and pale. She looks really tired and listless. "Is it because of me?" Maya wondered herself.
"Let's go in. It's getting cold out here." Mom said as she realized Maya was wearing hospital attire for patient and it was late afternoon of the middle of the spring. She waited for Maya to make a move but Maya didn't. Maya wanted to hurt her mother so badly the same way as mom hurt her by abandoning her and go to Russia. Well, it's not literally abandoning her but Mom leaves her and dad because of work. Maya ignored her mother. "Leave me alone and just go back to Russia and continue what you are supposed to do. You'd never care about me before and why you want to care about me so badly now?" Said Maya. Mom cleared her throat before she reply. " Baby, I'd never wanted to leave you. I miss you every second of my life"
"That's all? What kind of crap are you talking about? You miss me? Did I hear wrongly? If you really miss me why you didn't say anything each time we met before this? We had dinner together and live in the same rood but we never had an actual conversation. I feel like a statue in the house. Did you ever realize that?" Maya's voice started to raise her voice despite her weak condition.
"I'm sorry baby. I know I was wrong before. I want to fix it. Give me one more chance and I'll try to fix it the best as I could. I'll make up with dad. I promise." pleads with a grief tone as she cries at the same time. Maya has never see her mom cry this bad before. Maya knows her mom is a strong woman but now Maya doesn't know.
"No Camelia. I had enough! This is not the first time we try to make up. You'll do it again and again. You regret today and you'll do it again next time. I'm sorry I can't do this anymore." Dad appears out of no where. Maybe he was there a long time ago but mom and Maya didn't realize.
"William. She's sick. Please just this time." Mom pleads dad.
"I'm sorry. I can't. We'll sign the divorce agreement this week. I know I may sounded selfish and not considerate but Maya should know this. Till when she must be lied? She has gone through a lot. She must know that our relationship have reach to an end. Now or later she'll know soon. Don't be a hypocrite Camelia. Stop hurting her. You give her fake hope and leave her again." Dad said. There is no sad expression on dad's face. I don't know for how long this matter has been kept from me but the way dad acts, it seems that the problem has exist a long time ago.
"The real reason why you move to Russia is because of a guy." Dad continues.
"Stop it, William! She's sick." Mom gives dad a sharp look but dad doesn't care. He wants to continue some more and before dad continues, mom had slap him.
"I said enough!" Her voice cracks a bit.
"You stay with him at Russia and at the same time ask me to pretend everything is okay in front of Maya with reason for Maya's future. You used me because you know that Russian guy doesn't want Maya but you know if we divorced, Maya'll follow me. So you create excuses and I foolishly do as what you had said. You want everything in this life follow the flow that you have determined. You are selfish!" Dad revealed the truth as if the slap didn't lie on his face.
Mom didn't say anything after that because everything that dad has said is all true. She looked down embarrassed.
Maya let out a loud and long sigh. She was angry but at the same time relieved. She just knew about the truth of her parents. Maybe her parents are better off their own way. What's the point pretending everything is okay when the truth you are bleeding inside? Maya realized how her action just made things worse. She just about to continue the tortures again between her parents because of her doing.
Maya stands up and said "Mom, dad. Do what you are suppose to do. I don't want to become a cause of unhappiness. Two is better than one. That one person should give in for the sake of the two persons that she love and that is what I am doing right now. I'll be alright mom, dad."
They hugged each other as one family before went back inside and everything will change. A change that will make two person get back their happiness and one person in grief.
~The end~
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