THE WORST WEEK
This week was my very first Kakunin Test
which also known as Japanese Test which consist of reading, listening, writing
and reading Kanji and Japanese vocab. Although it was only a test and not a
midyear or final exam, these every two weeks tests will contribute about 20% of
your final semester mark. Since this was my first Kakunin Test ever and the
covered topics were bearable enough, I had decided to give it the best shot. I
studied few days earlier for the test and the test was conducted on Wednesday
of this week.
I sat for the test with the palpitating heart.
The test was going on smoothly until the last paper which was reading paper. I
answered every questions carefully and wrote the answers on the given paper. I
was bundled with joy as I got to answer every questions and couldn’t wait for
the test to finish. The waiting didn’t last long and in the end, the lecturer
announced that the test had finished and we had to put down our pencils. While
she was collecting test papers, I sensed something was amiss. I realized that
from the beginning of answering the questions and writing the answers, I was
writing them on the worksheet! And the best part was my answer sheet which
needed to be submit was clean and empty. Without wasting much time, I put up my
hand to inform the lecturer about my unfortunate situation that I was in.
To be honest, she reminded us three times
before about it where you were supposed to write the answers on the answer
sheets and not the worksheets. She came to me and took my paper away. So
basically, I sent an empty paper to the lecturer. After the class finished, I
took my hand phone from the bag and rushed up to the toilet. I attempted to
call my dad only to realize that my prepaid had come to an expiry date and I
couldn’t make a phone call unless I top up my prepaid. In the end, I washed up
my face and went back to the class with puffy eyes and teary nose. The Japanese
class went on as usual after the Kakunin Test and I was late for the class. It
was only around 10 am on that time and there were about 7 hours to go before I
finished the class for the day. I thought I couldn’t pull through the day but
somehow I managed to. I believed that if God puts me on a trial, I knew He was
planning to give me something better.
I didn’t know if what my lecturer had done
was the best from other people perspectives but from my perspectives, my
lecturer had done her best. I got 0 for the first time in my life. The total
mark was 25 and I lost all that 25 marks. My ranked on that section was 149/149
which was the lowest in my batch. This was also the first time in my life where
the lowest rank was mine. It was a huge lost isn’t it? One thing about life is,
once the moment is gone, it is gone forever. You can never rewind time because
if you did, life won’t be as interesting as it is now anymore. Regrets? Yes and
also no. Since the answer could only be one, my answer would be no. It was
something that is meant to happen and it did happened. There are things that
are beyond of your controls. You can plan and have a grand plan but in the end,
it wasn’t you who decide whether the plan is going as it is or not. You can
only plan but God will have the final say.
Why didn’t I regretted? Well, I didn’t
regret much because I got to learn a new life lesson. Although it came to me a
bit pricey but it was worth it. I got to learn how to deal with failures and
what it felt like being failed. I failed sometimes but I guess this was yet the
worst as of now. In life, you will experience failing countless times until at
your breaking point. This was only a beginning for me and more to come. Learn
from the mistakes because without making mistakes, life would be dull and
bored. Just because I said I didn’t regret that doesn’t mean I wasn’t in grief
at all. In fact, I did mourned for the loss of that precious 25 marks but life
has to continue on so I did.
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